Loser Love Diaries 8: A new Self

I've recently adopted a new way of looking at my love life. That is, I no longer look on most every girl who walks my way with lust or every seemingly happy couple on with jealously; rather, I'm not entirely sure if it's wise to ever rush into any relationship of any sort.

This has been partly the result of talking with a friend of mine, after I asked him, "Is it ever actually worth it to have a girlfriend?" To which he responded, "Well, if you two enjoy spending time with one another and have started your relationship as friends, yes." My love life had a strategic flaw before: that I would ruthlessly talk to and try anything I could to get to know as many girls as I could better.

Now, I keep my head held high, because I know I am something girls seek. I am (other people have told me this [not only my mother, but girls my age], so it is not vain to say) handsome, confident, intelligent, thoughtful, considerate, funny, charismatic and so forth. I enjoy cooking, cleaning (I just mention these two otherwise odd pastimes because how many guys do other than me?), dancing, talking, partying and generally spending time with other people. If girls can't see what I have to offer, then they're the ones sorely missing out.

Of course, all the drivel I've just vomited on the screen before you may sound suspiciously cliché, and I've likely culled it from the load of romantic/love-centric media I've consumed over the past few months as I've began actually thinking about love and taking it seriously. But what I say is true. I don't need to be at the beck and call of every pretty girl I see. I have a lot more to offer than most guys do. I'm sensitive and enjoy talking, when most guys just want to huddle around the TV, watching football and pay their girl any attention only when they want to fuck.

Unlike most men, I'm not looking for a girl to fuck. I never have been. Yes, sex is supposedly joyful and so on and so forth, but for one, I don't feel comfortable having sex yet and nor is that the point of a relationship to me. A relationship is so you can spend time with someone, nearly all the time. To the point where you are no longer annoyed by the other person. To the point where each of you actually enjoy spending time with one another.

Instead, I am (or more accurately, have been) looking for a girl to spend time with. Full stop. I enjoy spending time with and speaking to girls. I've never realized that so clearly since I've began studying here in Germany and girls here have actually given me a chance, unlike their paranoid, sheepish American counterparts, who constantly assume I want to rape them, which could not be farther from the truth. Americans think about worst-case scenarios all the damn time. Too often, if you ask me -- to the point where some are unable to enjoy their lives anymore.

Now though, I realize friends (girl friends [with whom I have no romantic relationship], guy friends) can suffice just as well as any girlfriend. I think I've sought a girlfriend in particular for so long because you can spend nearly every day with said person without the relationship ever getting stale or awkward -- you can do things and touch the person in ways, well, I couldn't (nor would want to) a dude.

I realize though, I just hate being alone altogether. So long as I have friends with me, I don't care if I have a relationship at all.

So the lesson is to wait for the right girl, and to not force relationships. I can still be social, friendly and even flirty, but I shouldn't be so dead-set on making every potential relationship with every potential girl work. Because it most certainly won't. If it doesn't, no sweat off my back and I'll just gladly keep on looking.

A Blog about a Blog: Something I actually care about

In my journalism course here at Marquette, I am beholden to produce content for my new Weebly site. Visit my site, if you so dare.

It is pitiful. I never wanted to make it. Nor cover the Virginian-Pilot. Who cares about mainstream news? Not I.

I bit my lip and continued to write for my journalism course. A few days prior, though, I created something I am truly proud of.

That is MarquetteMotors.com. My brainchild. My life and love centered around cars, all wrapped up in a hard, candy shell. Or website.

So to turn this blog post into more of a persuasive essay, why can't I simply continue perusing a form of journalism for which I actually give a you-know-what about? It makes no sense. None whatsoever.

I recently read chapter two of JournalismNext by Mark Briggs, as per class assignment. And everything  the book described were all the trials and tribulations I am now facing with MarquetteMotors. So why can't I go forth with MarquetteMotors, rather than fiddle around with a silly, user-UN-friendly, unintuitive Weebly, for which I have little care or concern?

In fact, I am learning more with my own website than I think I ever will with that silly Weebly site. And most of that information is self-taught!

I figure this comes from me actually caring about what I'm writing about...? Small wonder, Marquette.

I care about my topics, I care about being ahead of the curve, I care about producing content on a daily and thus, timely basis and most of all, I care about my readership. All of which was described by JournalismNext. So don't tell me I didn't do my homework.

Evolve, Marquette University's journalism program. Evolve.

The All-New Mercedes A45 AMG

The all-new Mercedes A45 AMG. Commence drooling.

It's quite good looking, but in typical Mercedes fashion, it does everything wrong for me: it's heavy, it's expensive and it features some new goofy transmission that rules your gear selection more than Terminator would with a gun to your head.

It will supposedly weigh less than 1,500kg. But 1,500kg is a lot! Certainly light for a Mercedes, but I'm tired of making these qualifiers! This is the precise reason Mercedes owners' clubs take trips to the golf course rather than the race track.

In the back of virtually every Mercedes engineer's head is the desire to put a higher emphasis on luxury over performance. And when they want performance, luxury is the last thing they'll sacrifice, after fuel economy, the stereo and a quiet exhaust note have all been thrown out the window.

For me, a "real" car fan (argue what you will what that entails), but in short, I love lightweight, manual-transmission sports cars with rear-wheel drive. This car is none of those. Nor is it expected to be cheap. It's estimated to cost anywhere from $55,009.50 to $62,868.00. However it's worth noting these figures were achieved after a Pound-to-Dollars conversion. I'm even skeptical this thing's even going to come to the 'States.

All that means one less douchebag with an undeserved sense of self-fulfillment for owning a car well above his own driving ability and despite this, thinks he's an F1 driver thanks to the car he drives. In our country, anyway.

Enormous Frustration: SCCA Northwest Indiana Region for April 15, 2012

I realize this is weeks old now, but after searching for my results online, I found that for my first official autocross, I did very competently. I felt I deserved a far better result with the times I was clocking it at. But no, the SCCA seems to have a deep-seated hatred for all things BMW.

My, or should I say, my father's 2007 BMW 328xi, for which he was gracious enough to allow me to drive to the [not so] wonderful city of Gary, IN to participate in the Northwest Indiana Region SCCA autocross for Sunday, April 15, 2012.

In an older post, I said how "great" things went. Sure. They went real "great." No really, as cynical as I sound, they really did go quite well. However, I am quite astonished with how unfair the SCCA rulings are for my FULLY, GODDAMN STOCK BMW. Not a single modification was made to this car. Not only because it isn't mine, but also because its sole [and quite sad] purpose to to carry people from the proverbial "point A" to "point B." If you can ever pinpoint them on a map for me, get back to me and I'll give you a cookie.

Anyway, back to how unfair the SCCA is to BMWs. My dad's car was fully stock, and yet, I was placed in the ASP group, which implies that I have GODDAMN high performance tires, GODDAMN coilovers, GODDAMN brake upgrades, and any other sort of GODDAMNNESS. No. I had all-season run-flat tires, OEM brakes, OEM suspension, and not a mod to be seen, unless you consider my sister's wonderfully artistic scrape to the right of the front bumper. But seriously.

 Here are my results if you dare to look. Look for my name, it's "Michael Lenoch," in case you happened to forget. The best raw time I posted was a 48.152. Which is not bad. Not bad at all. Especially noting what I had to work with here, people!

My Results ARE HERE!

See, I am so angry with this situation because of how screwed I got thanks to what the rulebook said. If you look at my, and my fellow novice competitors' raw times, you will see that I fairly got fifth place out of eight. However, I would and [damn well] should have received a better time multiplier from being placed in the D-Stock group, which I never was. Sure, we read it in the handbook. 2006-2010 BMW 3 Series automobiles belong in ASP (that's "A Street Prepared") group, but this made no sense. The only competition I had in my class was a fully modified 1993 Mazda RX-7 with coilovers, summer tires and brakes. Okay, SCCA, that's fair.

And your organization is a joke.