Thursday, April 5, 2012

Facebook Fights: Get over It!

As of this writing, the third in a recent string of fights via Facebook have taken place on my wall or others.

They typically go as follows, I post a slightly too cheeky comment on someone's status or write on someone's wall in a way that irritates them. The joke in my opinion is never by any means harsh or cruel. On the contrary, it is often lighthearted and sarcastic.

Said person then procedes to "retaliate." I use this word deliberately because he or she gets all up in arms. There is virtually nothing to stop this stack of bricks from falling. Once I commence the proverbial "rage mode" in said person, there is no turning back. No matter how many "sorry" responses I issue, how many times I retaliate or how many times I attempt to backpedal. At that point, the bricks have already fallen.

I think the source of this rage is how thoroughly serious people are in everything they do. There is no problem being serious and taking your life seriously with what your education, your career, love life, social life, hobbies etc. However, at a certain point, unless you happen to be the single dullest, most humorless person, you need to be able to laugh at yourself.

There is no better way to develop your careers and your relationships than to be able to laugh at yourself. People love self-deprecating humor. And if you take yourself too seriously to do so, you can roll over and die. Sure you have the "get it done" mentality so many people seek, you have no personality to go along with that. You need to be well-rounded in that you are willing to admit your faults every once in a while. And if laughing at yourself is so painful, you can go ahead and get your teeth pulled right now. Because it's not. Lighten up, and get over it!

Peoples' issue today is that they take themselves too seriously. You have no sense of humor if you can only make fun of other people and you lack any discernable amount of personal integrity if you can laugh at everyone but yourself.

If you are anything like the descriptions above, you need to stop getting your panties in a bunch any time anyone is even slightly impolite. The world is filled with constantly rude and harsh people. If a couple of jokey, non-serious words on the internet get you pissed off, you need to re-evaluate your life's values! If you then lack the imagination to consider, even roughly, the off chance that someone may be joking, then get a clue!

And then to allow the "perpetrator" no way out after committing such an unforgivable "travesty" (oh no!) is positively absurd. Give people some room to ask for forgiveness, pardon them for their unsavory actions, etc. It is draconian to say the least to offer no forgiveness to people who make even the subtlest of mistakes. If this describes you, then put yourself in his or her shoes.

Out of all of this, I hate how people are foolish enough to be fully convinced that what was once a joke is fully serious and intentionally mean-spirited. How do you get such idiotic ideas in your head?! Take into account, for one moment, how a given person behaves in person and when reading their internet contributions, say them in your head with their voice. Don't snap-knee-jerk-reaction-assume that they are being deliberately cruel and unfair! Give them a chance to be funny and redeem yourself.

Today, unfortunately, the internet offers none of this, what with the advent of the internet message board "troll" culture, where strangers are mean to other strangers. On Facebook, we're all friends here. Take it easy. Take a breather. Don't get all caught up!


Ms. Williams said...

Hi. I saw your blog post on a link in LinkedIn, and out of curiosity decided to read. I agree with you 100%. People take themselves way too seriously. It goes double-time on Facebook, which is why I either refrain from posting it or responding if I think it's going to "go there", if you get what I mean. I've come to find that FB can easily become a digital hotbed for status drama in an instant. I try not to get mad and start arguing online. It's really silly and a bad look at my ripe old age. It's really not that serious.

I'm so glad you posted this. It needed to be said!

FlammBlog said...

Wow thank you, Ms. Williams! This is perhaps the only positive comment I've received on this blog!