Sunday, March 25, 2012

The Fast and the Furious (1955): The Slow and the Cheerful

I recently watched the original The Fast and the Furious film and cannot begin to describe how disappointing it was. For the 2001 film to share the namesake is a travesty in itself.

The acting is dreadful and melodramatic. The cinematography is amateurish and unwieldy. The plot lacks common sense, and one plot line "magically" leads to another.

To give you a gist of the film, a vigorous man, a beautiful, young woman and a generously proportioned man find themselves in a cafe. The larger man offers the vigorous man a ride in his truck. He declines the ride as well as to exchange his name. The lady working at the cafe goes to retrieve the pineapple juice requested by the young woman, and the stern man knocks the fat man out. Suffice to say, the man of the vigorous persuasion goes to take the woman with him on a number of escapades, running from the police.

Throughout the film, it is revealed that the angry man has committed murder which is why he's running. The woman has a race to go to, but the man wants to go to Mexico to run away. Conveniently, the race is near the Mexican border.

But, because this film was produced in 1955, and men of that era had insurmountably large egos, it was concluded, rather logically, that woman could not partake in this race. So the man does driving the woman's car instead. Misogyny at its finest.

This film's plot is so ham-handedly thrown together that I don't care to give much more thought nor effort to describing it.

I had such high expectations for a film that shares the name with my favorite. I suppose Universal Pictures used the name because the public forgot how the horrible film the original was, owned the rights to the name or thought the name was markedly more evokative than any result of a word-combination game their marketing team could come up with using dart boards and post-it notes.

Do not see this film. You will thank me while you are not watching it, and say to yourself, "Wow, almost anything is better than not seeing that horrible movie!"

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