Lax Bros, Please Forgive Me

I would like to offer a formal apology to any and all lacrosse players who took offense with my earlier post.

The reason I am presenting this apology is because a good friend of mine told me how much this coach meant to everyone. In fact, he said the coach acted as a father to one player who lost his father a year ago. I never truly understood the seriousness behind this firing until this was explicitly revealed to me.

I am not saying sorry however, in order to somehow regain the respect of lacrosse players for I realize it cannot be earned so easily, especially considering that I blatantly offended an individual so close to so many. For this, I apologize.

Just know that I was much too quick to jump to conclusions, and made far too many assumptions. I am sorry for this as well.

I am also sorry for voicing irrational and unfounded opinions that, despite being funny for possibly a moment, were only offensive and rude in the long run.

Whether you forgive me or not, please know that I am infinitely sorry for what I have said and no longer think in such a way. I am sorry to strike at such an inopportune moment as well, when the Ignatius community was at such an all-time low. I apologize for my lack of sympathy and imprudent words.

You can forgive me if you wish. I just want you to know how earnestly and truthfully I present this apology.

- Michael Lenoch

Dear American Drivers

WHETHER you fall under the category of a "poor" or "incompetent" driver or not, it is still worth noting that from my experience, which is admittedly limited, American drivers are notoriously the worst. Disobeying traffic laws, forgetting how to drive when a puddle appears, being so distracted by radios, phones, and passengers as to cause some of the most brain-dead driving accidents are only a few of the plethora of issues with driving on American roads.

First and foremost, I must address that not all American drivers are poor ones. In fact, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt that you, yes you, the one reading my words as I type them, are not [inherently] a poor driver! (If I didn't add that qualifier, "inherently", well now, I'd just be lying!) But nonetheless, most sure seem to be!

It seems the problem of drivers' general incompetence stems from the relatively poor driving instruction that is available to the public; either via public high schools, or special learning centers. And especially with regards to the driving tests that are given by the DMV centers throughout these 'States. Sure, they are intended to appeal, and thus, function for the least-common denominator of this nation, but I mean what the hell? How low are this nation's standards? Especially considering that the language found in the tests is intended for individuals with whom English is their second language.

Now I don't intend to outright bash immigrants for things that they cannot change and had no part. But instead, the organizations behind what is now this driving shenanigans in the US, for making all of their tests in English. To play devil's advocate, certainly road signs are in English, and it would make sense for the tests to be as well. But by dumbing down the general populace simply in order to accommodate a growing contingency is wrong to me. Why don't they take an alternate path, and accommodate the increasing number of immigrants in a different way, like providing alternate language tests so that ultimately, the complexity of the language found in the test and the courses could be increased dramatically?

Also, after writing the above paragraph, I realize this has already turned into more of a diatribe than a productive means for me to spread ideas, so I apologize. Ahem.

Driving in the US has its problems, as any nation anywhere in the world does, but driving in the US is quite peculiar. People love to drive fast, myself included. But there is a palpable obsession with being privy to monitor one's speed, and to maximize it whenever possible, whether strictly legal or not. A common example is when a speed limit sign on an interstate highway is posted at "55 MPH", yet the average person is likely to well exceed that at 80 miles per hour, if not, only slightly less. And individuals stopped on the highway are commonly only stopped as a means for example, or in other words, "fear tactics".

"Fear tactics" are applied by police officers in Chicago quite excessively (I can't quite speak for the other sectors of the US), and as I find, rather than to promote safety, produce paranoia, and heightened irrational fears in drivers. So, without getting bogged down, in order to fully optimize safety and security on the roads, education of new, incoming drivers should have the highest possible quality, as the tests should be increased in rigorousness ten-fold. As from what I've heard, European driving exams are unimaginably difficult, and thus, produce significantly more capable, confident, safe, and secure drivers who are not afraid nor unable to drive at high speeds, ultimately, reducing the demand for police officers, and finally, reducing paranoia within the consciousness of drivers.

A perfect example of the responsibility that the government in Germany hands over to the driving public in rewarding them for earning their drivers' licenses is the Autobahn and other various unlimited-speed streets and highways found throughout Europe. In the US, it seems, people simply couldn't handle having no speed limits. By either this nation's historical immaturity, or immaturity within people specifically, people tend to behave more immaturely as well, which is why it seems the government isn't yet, and will not be ready to hand over to use unlimited-speed highways and public roads.

Freedom of Speech: An Illusion?

Last week, I was called out by both classmates and family members alike on one of my more malicious posts. This post, while for the most part true, admittedly had a rather palpable slant on it, leaning more in favor of my sister's condemnation over her redemption. I suppose the dialogue following the semicolon in the post's title wasn't explored thoroughly enough. I spent much of my time ranting a blue streak on how my sister irritates me, while ignoring her more amiable qualities, for which I am now more keen to realize.

So this brings about an interesting point; do I have a freedom of speech? To say as I please? To say whatever may be on my mind? The answer is not quite. While I sense very few individuals read my blog, with an occasional spike here and there, I am still not all that free when it comes to the content and the nature by which I communicate that content, especially given that my parents seem to have a newfound web destination in an attempt to keep me in line: this very blog.

I think when I escape their wrath, I will be more able to exercise my freedom of speech, with my next meal already paid for, and impossible to be arbitrarily taken away for the sake of punishment. But to be honest, I think it's extraordinarily unfair that my parents forced me to remove that post no matter how destructive it may have been. The truth in all writing is what matters most, and so if they had instead asked me that I modify the post so that it didn't outright discriminate my sister, I would have been understanding. Though, they reasoned that it would hurt my chances of getting into college, or a place in the ever-shrinking workforce. Paranoia of an impending "Big Brother" figure, I presume? Silly.

So in all, it appears any malicious content I write cannot go unaccounted for.

Why I Care if you Comment or Like my Statuses

FOR ages, I have decried Facebook for being inconsequential, and a superficial way of "communicating" with friends. But since then, I've somewhat come around on it, looking at it as a way to share--to share YouTube videos, music, blogs, or other links--particularly, to share things that I have made to the greater public, such as my YouTube videos, my music, my blogs, etc.

While for the most part my Facebook status feed is cluttered to the brim with lousy rap music, miscellaneous sports plays and interviews, and political or celebrity scandals links, I take the opportunity for sharing to share my own content, rather than mainstream, already-seen-it, mass-market, mass-media garbage, I give you something a little more unique, niche, if you will, more interesting.

So in the same vein with my statuses, I painstakingly come up with witty, and largely, strange ones that I hope will provoke thought and wonder. But it seems my intentions are often ignored by most, if not all of my friends. Either they don't have time to think, or are rarely ever willing to do so, my statuses are looked upon as an afterthought.

People with numerous comments or "likes" following a status boast this as a point of pride, or even, popularity. I wouldn't doubt that I've fallen out of favor among friends given how unwilling they are to read my unique and unusual statuses and content.

So is it that people simply want more of the same when it comes to Facebook statuses? Or do they want originality, but the issue is more that they rarely know how to respond to their perplexing messages?

Do people truly want a million Kanye West, or Ke$ha song lyrics in their status feeds, or do they want intriguing, existential queries that provoke and force growth in us?

Stamping Out Feminism

In my understanding, for which women will obviously and invariably deem as "ignorant", there is no need for Feminism. Feminism is like a Gay Parade, an obsolete and ineffective Civil Rights Movement that bears little relevance today. We know you're all females, but you are not necessarily better than us males, nor are we necessarily better than you all. You don't need to boast so indignantly, to trumpet your feminineness to the high heavens. We already know you are a female, your favorite color is pink, and a good chunk of your friends are homosexual males, or so our preconceived notions tell us.

Equally, us males are not constantly lost, directions-refusing buffoons who must act like mindless primates in order to interact with our supposed "man side", despite us all being, deep down, skirt-wearing pansies. We are not results of stereotypes. We can multi-task just as well as your secretary likes to brag about. And on that note, even we can be secretaries too! Heck, why not even nurses.

If you couldn't tell by now, I am an adamant egalitarian. I don't believe in Feminism, and much like our Feminist-aware society, equally don't believe in Masculinism. (Which is humorously evidenced by Google Chrome's signature red line that highlights the obscurity of this term I clearly just made up, "Masculinism").

Back to the point (see, right now I'm multi-tasking. Look at me world! I'm better than you!) Feminism was once a necessity, and I will concede that unequal wages between the two sexes is an increasing issue. When Feminism was in vogue, there was a palpable need for it: women didn't have the right to vote, were excluded from many sectors of society, and were prevented from owning property among many other crying issues. And yes, in the Middle East in particular, the blatant inequalities for which women must suffer are severe, arbitrary, and often tragic, and those very cultural boundaries should be pushed forward, questioned, and challenged, displaying the true power of women. Unlike some superficial, glittery, flowery, pink-and-purple sticker you put on your lunchbox that says "Girl Power", the power of women speaks for itself, and they are just as much a force to be reconciled with as men.

In an attempt to avoid the unavoidable, I shall start this paragraph off with the weak "I think" line. So, I think Feminism in Europe and North America has a far smaller place in society as it once did. I believe Feminism needs to be pushed outside Western society in places such as the aforementioned, Middle East, Asia, Africa, and South America, and less as emphasized in our societies where women largely share identical rights to those possessed by their male counterparts. But I deliberately use the word "largely", as I am aware that not all equal rights have been fulfilled, so take my statements with a grain of salt, please.

So in closing, men should not further succumb to Feminism, and should not be forced to tolerate this prideful celebration of womanhood, especially if there is not an equal celebration of manhood in place. (You more snarky Feminists out there would likely argue that pubs and sports bars already make up that void, but the same could be said about your excessive boutiques, hair-styling salons, designer clothing, shoe, belt, scarf, watch and sunglasses brands).

So I leave you with this, Ceteris paribus.

Andy Molnar

Andy Molnar is one of my best friends, but at times, can be a mortal enemy with polarly opposite views.

For example, we may disagree in terms of tastes and preferences, political views, religion, drugs, ect. When I disagree with him though, it is often because much of what he believes in, in a rather post-modern sense, has no base, no standard, no strict parameters from which the idea must not deviate. To specify what I mean, he commonly embodies a "live and let live", or "screw the haters" mentality that is aggravatingly inconsistent and frequently is contradicted by Andy himself.

For instance, Andy is an adamant supporter of hip-hop and rap, decrying anything and anyone who doesn't like the exact same music as he does: I call it arrogance. With especial regard to his tastes in video games, anything that's not a Halo or a Call of Duty is in his mind, "wrong": I call it immaturity. And anyone that is not in total favor of the Xbox 360, Andy deems idiotic: I call it xenophobia.

Mouse and keyboard, arguably the best interface for gaming, period, Andy sees as "lame". World of Warcraft, the single most popular game in all of time, which boasts 12 million plus players, countless awards, and some of the highest praises from the media, Andy sees as "gay". Playstation 3, despite its incredible breadth of software, free online service, and revolutionary PSN games, Andy understands it as "stupid".

So as you can see, Andy is tremendously biased, rarely is ever willing to see an issue from another side, and can't bear to understand anything unless he tries it himself, and even at times, he still can't reconcile with the quality of something he once denounced.

But all that doesn't detract from the fact that he still remains one of my best friends. I love you Andy.

A Seriously Ungood Day

TODAY was a horrible day. In fact, "horrible" doesn't even begin to describe it.

This morning, I was awoken to the yell of my sister, saying "They're already here!". They, being my carpool that my sister, herself arranged just last night for our last day of final exams. As soon as I could grasp this reality, I got ready as soon as possible, ignoring the hygiene of my teeth, and struggling one at a time with my contacts that for some inextricable reason wouldn't go in!

Then by the time I got ready, and mind you it's 7:30 exactly--not that bad of a time for an 8:10 exam--I went downstairs, opened our front door to the sight of an empty driveway. I thought one of two things: (1) they're all late, my sister gave me an early warning, and I'm the one who's early, or (2) I was indeed the one late. And if entitling this entry with my adjective, "ungood" doesn't blatantly hint at the fact that choice number two is what happened, then I don't know what will.

So the situation wasn't a good one. I then thought I could take my car, and just screw over my sister, forcing her to get a ride with someone else, but then I knew she would berate me to no end, and I would suffer great consequences. I decided to ask my father if he'd drive me, especially given that should he, unlike me, be caught speeding, wouldn't have his license taken away, knows the Ogden route to school much better, I could study along the way, and also I wouldn't be forced to park for I could simply run out like a madman on a getaway mission.

Thus my father drove me to school, and during much of it, I spent my time partially studying my Religion notes, and keeping a keen eye on both clock and road. Almost in an act of cruelty, the clock slowly swept past 7:50, then 8:00, then most unbearably, 8:10. By this time, we weren't even on Roosevelt, and I knew I would face shame, humiliation, and possibly even the prospect of having my test moved back, which wouldn't bode well given that I instructed my sister to keep my car unlocked, and to place the keys in it so as to ensure that I get them, rather than the "per chance" opportunity of seeing her in the hallway or on the street and receiving the keys from her then and there.

As soon as my father pulled in front of the school, I booked. I stopped worrying, and hoped for the best. But those hopes were soon sullied as I saw not a single other student in my shoes. At this point, I was severely, nearly inexcusably late. By 8:18, I ran up the stairs, ran through the brown-carpeted hallway, and ran into the silence of room 145, the computer lab in which my class was taking their religion final.

I opened the door ever so slyly, and at my arrival, received modest clapping by only two students. I had thought surely, this was going to be a class act (no pun intended), but as it seemed, everyone was hard at work at this intricate 150-question test, and couldn't be bothered to perform an act of tomfoolery. The instructor present in our class was Mr. (Coach) Stassen, and he kindly told me where to sit, and I did so diligently, grateful that he didn't berate me for my insolence.

With 150 questions to go, and 52 minutes to spare, I revved my brain and typed faster than I ever have before, "Username: Michael.Lenoch, Password: ********", pressed "Enter", and away I went. I opened Edline.net, headed straight for the "School Login", and was faced again with another login query. I complied to the technology's antics, and then clicked on "Religion 4", and later, the "Tests" folder. To my concern, an error screen appeared, and was prompted, yet again, to sign in to the silly website. I did so with equal haste, and made my way, finally, to the test page.

Incredibly, based on my brief studying on the car ride to school, I found a great deal of the questions easy, or so I had thought. I blissfully blasted past all 150 questions by 8:48, allowing me more than ample time to check my work. Occasionally, my teacher, Mr. McLarty came into the room to assist us with any confusion. By his second trip, he came up to me, completely unsolicited, patted me on the back, and said "So good for you to join us" with a wide smile. I smiled my best in return, with dirty teeth and all, giving him the cue to leave the room.

While checking my masterpiece, I heard a fellow student cry "Walsh!", the last name of yet another classmate, Matt Walsh. Tolerating the intermittent disturbances of cry and Apple's signature volume control sound alike, I checked my 100% exam, and found only two questions to change. I promptly did so, and was on my way to submitting the final exam, which if I remember correctly, counts for 15% of my grade. Oh joy.

I got 60% of my questions correct. This clearly was the shame and humiliation I was expecting as I walked into the door of my beloved school. I had no qualms sharing this score, as evidenced by me posting the very tidbit this very public blog, which had me share it among friends, and often provoked laughter. After I received one laugh, I then said the score with a smile. For the life of me, I feel I cannot do well on Mr. McLarty's tests. They're simply too in-depth, especially considering this past one was a SEMESTER exam, which means it should rather broadly, cover everything in this semester, not a few weeks of that semester, all under a microscope.

So I reveled in the poor score. People in the hallway asked, and surprisingly, some had already known. Regardless, this wasn't my primary concern at the moment. I had to find my sister because I had a sneaking suspicion that she didn't follow through with my request for her to leave the keys of my car underneath the passenger's seat. I scoured the school. 40s hallway, second floor, third floor, 50s hallway, second floor, third floor, but to no avail. I concluded she must be in the first floor where I had taken my exam. I looked there too, but also, to no avail. In fact, I again came across my harsh test-giving, back-patting, snarky comment-delivering teacher, Mr. McLarty. I carried out a brief conversation with him as I attempted to explain myself based on the perplexed expression he rendered at first. I told him my dilemma until the computer lab technician came and started to talk to him, I left him. As I journied through the school I asked suburbanite after another whether I could have a ride, but yet again, to no avail. One was going to New York for the four-day weekend, another going to lunch, and another had a Precalculus exam.

I went to the car, incredulous that the keys were where I instructed for my sister to place them. I entered the salt-ridden, black BMW via the passenger's door, expecting the keys below the seat, but unsurprisingly, they weren't there. I looked all around--from the rear, to the glove compartment, to the center console--I tried multiple times, moving both the driver and passenger seats so as to expose my dear keys, but to no avail. After my excavation, I finally came across a bulge in the driver's floor mat. Incredibly, my key and keyless entry switch sat peacefully there all along while I reeked mayhem looking for them. Evidently, my sister feared the car would go stolen given that it was totally unlocked, in the city, and to her foolishness, parked right in the front of the lot, which didn't help our chances of it not getting stolen one bit. Coping from the fumes coming from my head, I gracefully backed out and I was outta' there. Thank the Lord.

Gender Dynamics

Male, female. Female, male.

Do I offend you whether or not you are female or male, or you are male or you are female based on the order I list the two genders? This sensitivity, which seems to be part of the average female and male psyche, oftentimes clashes with one another. In modern times, you see Feminism receive wide acceptance, and Misogyny to be denounced just as widely. Out with old, in with the new, or as post-modernists would say, "Out with the Church, in with Atheism".

Both sexes have distinct versions of egotism. Whether my observations are unfounded, here is what I conclude; males think of themselves are hard-minded, disciplined, dominant, brawny, while females commonly are egotistical in the way they seek to promote themselves, typically aesthetically, and also socially. We're seeing a growing movement of women object to their lack of "rights". I deliberately impose quotation marks upon the plural subject that has come to denote ability or liberty for the sheer fact that the assessment that women lack "rights" is completely unfounded.

What is true is that women lack equal pay of their male counterparts, but it seems the more liberal, those who are leading-the-Feminist-charge-women have an insatiable thirst for "freedom" (despite them possessing it already).

An apt metaphor to this situation would be a father, representing the state, or the government, or what have you. Objective in [its] pursuits, caring, yet bold, and will bend over backwards for justice and liberty for all. The state has two children, Billy, representing the male contingency, and Sarah, who represents the female contingency. Many years ago, Billy could drive his father's car whenever he would like

In retrospect, and after reading this metaphor I crafted, my male perspective speaks for itself. Not only using a father to represent the state, but also subtly listing Billy before Sarah hint at my slight favor for malehood. And why not? I am a male after all. Am I to forget about my rights, my dignity, and prioritize female rights over my own, and thus, in an extreme string of events, become a Feminist? No. I am to bend over backwards, just as the father did to ensure that justice was kept, in my examples so as to merely keep any female that reads this happy? No. There are many, too many in my opinion, proud females that will incessantly decry males and invariably cite the merits of females over their counterparts.

But the truth of the matter is this: I am a male myself, and there is no separating anyone from any inadvertent prejudice, blatant, nor subtle. But despite this, we should strive to maintain stability and equality of rights: not give in to the petty demands of females, and not promote Misogyny in our population by making males too powerful. Yes, it is a change in the tennants of our social fiber. Yes, it is a tangible change that may be seen as a post-modern betrayal of yesterday's values. But instead, it is a push forward that will bring an end to xenophobia.

What will bring this to fruition is the ban on Feminism. Sounds extreme and unreasonable, I know. But Feminists only bring chaos to our system, their demands are outrageous, just as the dismissive behavior of Misogynists. And if Misogynists have fallen out of favor within the last 30 years, soon too will Feminists. It seems, Feminists have solely garnered support because at one time, they were the underdogs, the maids, the housewives, the underbellies, and the cookers, the cleaners, the stay-at-home-moms of society. As we see this increasingly change, the more I feel we should see Feminism fall out of favor for it is unnecessary in this day and age.

Egalitarianism should be met with open arms, and we should look at each other for the humans that we are--not necessarily forgetting the differences that each of us have, but rather than decrying those differences, we ought to celebrate them collectively, as a family, as friends, as sisters and brothers, as a society.

Blog Haiku

No one visits this,

I feel lonely, no comments,

No hit counter seen.

Please visit my blog,

It's funny and insightful,

No matter: no one.

I wish my blog was

More popular and people

Came to visit it.

I wish my career

Took off by virtue of this,

But to no avail.

My Understanding of Equality

I see no difference in race. I don't look at you for the color of your skin, your tongue, background, culture, customs, religion, or lack thereof. I am a self-proclaimed egalitarian, as Jesus was. I respect everyone with the intrinsic dignity that they all well deserve.

We truly all are people, united in our humanity and our human condition and especially cemented by our distinctly human struggles for which animals could never have a similar experience.

Certainly we have squabbles, failures, missteps, stumbling blocks, and may perform acts of swindling, cheating, and vengeance typical of our fierce humanity.

I love humanity for all that it is intrinsically good, and for all the bad we contribute to it. I will love you similarly.